This post explains why a Weekly Marriage Meeting for Christian couples is the single habit that has most strengthened our marriage, faith, and communication over time.

If you’re anything like us, you love a fresh start.

A new year. A new calendar. A clean slate.

But statistics tell us something sobering: most habits don’t last. Around 80% of people abandon their New Year’s resolutions within the first few weeks, and only a small percentage follow through for the entire year.

So instead of chasing dozens of new goals, what if you focused on one habit that quietly strengthens everything else?

After years of marriage, parenting, and ministry, we’re convinced there’s one habit that has made the biggest difference in our relationship:

The weekly marriage meeting.

Why Every Couple Needs a Weekly Marriage Meeting

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Why Most Marriage Goals Fail (And What Works Instead)

Many couples want:

• Better communication
• More connection
• Less tension
• A deeper spiritual life together

But intentions alone don’t create change.

Most marriages don’t struggle because of a lack of love. They struggle because of drift. Life fills up. Conversations become logistical. You’re busy, tired, and moving in parallel instead of together.

A weekly marriage meeting creates intentional space to stop drifting and realign.

What Is a Weekly Marriage Meeting?

A weekly marriage meeting is a set time on the calendar, once a week, where you and your spouse sit down without distractions to talk through guided questions.

For us, it usually lasts 30–60 minutes. We do ours on Sunday nights after the kids go to bed, but the day matters far less than the consistency.

The purpose isn’t to be rigid or overly structured. The purpose is clarity, connection, and alignment.

Why This One Habit Matters So Much

Here’s why the weekly marriage meeting works when other habits fail:

• It prevents issues from piling up
• It creates space for hard conversations without awkward timing
• It keeps logistics from becoming your only form of connection
• It builds gratitude, not resentment
• It reinforces shared values and spiritual rhythms

Most conflict in marriage comes from unmet expectations and unspoken assumptions. A weekly check-in brings those into the light before they become problems.

What We Actually Talk About in Our Weekly Marriage Meeting

Your meeting doesn’t need to look exactly like ours, but here’s the general structure we’ve followed for years.

1. Reflect on the Past Week

We start with something called High, Low, Buffalo:

• High: Best part of the week
• Low: Hardest or heaviest moment
• Buffalo: Something random, funny, or unexpected

This sets the tone and helps you mentally revisit the week together.

2. Spiritual Check-In

We ask:

• How was your time in Scripture and prayer?

If it wasn’t great, we don’t shame it. We problem-solve. This question often leads to simple adjustments that actually make consistency possible.

3. Serve and Be Served

We ask:

• How did I serve you well last week?
• How can I best serve you this week?

This builds gratitude and gives practical clarity moving forward.

4. Conflict and Communication

We talk through:

• Did we handle conflict well?
• Is anything unresolved?

Because this conversation is expected and scheduled, it reduces defensiveness and helps us debrief calmly rather than react emotionally.

5. Finances and Generosity

We check in on:

• Budget and spending
• Stewardship
• Ways we can be generous with time, talents, or resources

This keeps money from becoming a silent stressor.

6. Emotional and Physical Intimacy

We ask:

• How has our emotional and physical intimacy been?

This creates a safe, non-awkward space to talk about something that often gets avoided during the week.

7. Schedule and Expectations

We review the upcoming week:

• What’s on the calendar?
• What expectations should we set ahead of time?

This alone prevents a huge amount of unnecessary tension.

8. End With Appreciation

We always end by sharing three things we appreciate about each other.

Gratitude reorients your heart and ensures the meeting ends on a positive note.

The Long-Term Impact of a Weekly Marriage Meeting

We’ve been doing this for years, and the impact compounds.

It doesn’t make marriage perfect. It makes marriage intentional.

Small weekly check-ins lead to fewer blowups, deeper trust, clearer communication, and a stronger spiritual foundation over time.

This is what we mean by playing the long game.

How to Start This Week (Without Overcomplicating It)

If you’ve never done a weekly marriage meeting before, start simple:

1. Pick a consistent time
2. Put it on the calendar
3. Protect it like an important appointment
4. Use guided questions instead of winging it

You don’t need a perfect system. You just need a starting point.

If you want help implementing this habit, we created a Weekly Marriage Meeting Journal to guide the process step by step—but whether you use a journal or your notes app, the habit itself is what matters.

The One Degree Shift

Small changes, done consistently, create massive long-term impact.

If you make one shift this year, let it be this:

Set aside intentional time each week to reconnect, realign, and grow together.

Your future marriage will thank you.